


The blind side

by sPeache



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: 1d, AU larry stylinson, Angry Harry, Angry Sex, Angst, Blind Louis, Boat, BoyxBoy, Depressed Harry, Depression, Domestic, Drunk Harry, Famous Harry, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Gay, Gay Male Character, Gay Sex, Harry Styles - Freeform, Harry Styles Loves Louis Tomlinson, Hurt, Hurt Louis, Island - Freeform, Liam Payne - Freeform, Lirry - Freeform, Louis Tomlinson - Freeform, Louis Tomlinson Loves Harry Styles, Love, M/M, Narry - Freeform, Niall Horan - Freeform, Niam - Freeform, Nouis, Sad, Sad Harry, Sad Louis, Self Confidence Issues, Zayn Malik - Freeform, Zourry - Freeform, au larry, fight, lourry, one direction - Freeform, otp, the blind side, zarry - Freeform, ziall, ziam, zouis
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-12-09
Updated: 2014-04-06
Packaged: 2018-01-04 03:54:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 15,935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1076246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sPeache/pseuds/sPeache
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU: Harry is an infamous boybander who hates people more than he breathes.<br/>Louis is blind and he's trying to move on from his dark past.<br/>Then their world collides and Harry wants to break Louis, but ends up breaking himself and everything in his way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Everyone knew who Harry Styles was.

He was one band member of the biggest boyband in the world- One Direction.  
Harry along his two band members- Niall Horan and Liam Payne- quickly became on the top.It all started out as the three young boys auditioned for the X Factor in the UK. Slowly their music was spreading through to the US and to the rest of the world. They were three lucky guys indeed, who were living their dreams. Everyone thought they knew who the real Harry Styles is, but they didn't.

Harry Styles was indeed one of the most charming boys that you'll meet, with his curls and his dimples he could fool any human being and win them over just like that. With his cheeky remarks, everything was handed to him easily. With his contagious laugh that always made him close his eyes and scrunch up his face like there weren't anything funnier, he could make anyone smile, even the most bitter person. But they didn't know how dark his life really was. They didn't know how much he hated life and how much he struggled every day, with accepting that he's still alive. They didn't know that Harry Styles was a very bright guy on the outside, but with a dark ice broken heart.

He was the one who’s struggling with the fame.

The one who’s struggling with the hate.

The one who’s struggling with how the media portrays him; as a desperate manwhore who sleeps with every girl or woman that he is seen with.

The one who’s struggling with depression after that one accident who made a huge impact in his life.

The one who’s struggling with self-harm.

Sometimes along the way, he often asked himself “What did I do to deserve this?”

Of course he was thrilled and grateful, for everything that he has been handed so far. He had an amazing career, an amazing mum, an amazing sister, two amazing band members and friends. But there was so much hate. Too much hate for him to handle. Most of the stuff that was showed through media was lies and complete bullshit.  
He didn’t sleep around. He hasn’t shagged women that are over 45 years old. He doesn’t sleep with every girl or woman that he speaks too. His mother taught him when he was a little child, to always respect a girl and earn her trust. He wouldn’t sleep around with anyone, just like that. He had standards too of course. The fact that he's hiding in the closet didn't help much either.

Most of his friends used him for the fame and for the money. So he had Liam and Niall only. He also had Nick who’s been his best friend since they met at the day care. But the rest of them left him when they couldn’t get anything from him for free.

Life isn’t fair and you don’t get handed anything for free. If you are famous, then you have to pay a prize like the daily hate you get among a lot of other bad stuff.  
He had it all though. The bad and the good. But he couldn’t help but to feel that there’s a missing part in his life. Something big is missing in his life. Like a puzzle, he needs it to become happy again. To cure the depression. To help him with self-harming. He needed something that would change his life drastically.

Somebody who can save him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm currently writing this on wattpad and since it's going so well for the story, I decided to post it here as well. I hope you like the first chapter. This story isn't edited or reread yet, so I apologize for all the errors.

Louis took that final step and the doors automatically slid open for him. He held his stick tighter as he started making his way to the reception. Even though he can't see or know fully how the hospital looks like, he knew his way around.

He was used to walk into the huge fancy hospital, fancy because it was one of the most expensive private hospitals in the country. He took a deep breath as he made his way to the reception.

"Good day Mr Tomlinson. I'm just going to check you in and let Dr Harvey know that you're here. Have a seat and Dr Harvey will be here any minute."

Louis thanked the receptionist politely and then made his way to the waiting room. After several seconds, he found an empty seat, by touching the seat and making sure that  
nobody was sitting there. It wouldn't be a nice experience to sit on someone. It would be embarrassing Louis thought to himself.

He would have to explain why he sat on the stranger and the stranger would of course feel pity for him. They always did that. Feel sympathy for the young lad as he explained that he's been blind since he was born. Then they would pity him and make sure that he was safe. But they would never really approach him; they were too scared that he would be different than average people. That Louis wouldn't be normal because he can't see or know what stuff and people look like.

The next step would be that they would make fun of him. They thought that it was funny in a way that he was blind, because they could prank him and trip him, as he would never have a clue in the world that did it or why they did it. Louis gulped as he remembered all those horrible years during his childhood.  
He remembers all those terrible and nasty words that were thrown at him daily. It all started out when he was 10 years old. Just because he was different, the kids thought he was different, that he was stupid and not normal because he couldn’t see. He couldn’t read or write, because how could he do that when he doesn’t even know the alphabet? Jesus Christ he was only 10 years old.

He remembers when he was pushed down the stairs by a senior, who thought it would be funny and cool to embarrass the “disabled” kid in the school. Louis was only 13 at that time and he was so embarrassed and in such a bad state. He remembers hearing laughter around him, and him trying to stand up without anyone helping him. It hurt. It hurt so fucking bad. It hurt both mentally and physically. He really tried to stand up, but there was a pounding in his head, he felt dizzy and he could feel with his fingertips, that there’s a sort of a liquid dripping from his forehead. He knew that moment that the sticky liquid that was dripping from his forehead that he was bleeding. That’s all he remembers before he blacked out.

Thank fucking God that he's finished with school and that he doesn't have to go through that anymore.

"Mr Tomlinson, Dr Harvey is ready to see you now" the receptionist told Louis nicely.

Sometimes Louis wished that he would ask the receptionist for her name or her age, but what would be the difference? It's not the same receptionist who works at the hospital every single time that he visits the doctor. Though he wishes he could see what she looks like, what colors looks like, and most importantly he wished very well that he could see his surroundings.

Imagine not knowing what your face looks like, or what colors look like, what grass or the beach looks like. To not be able to picture what your family looks like, only through your imagination. Of course Louis could feel and touch; in that way it helped his other senses to create an imaginary picture of what small things or individual people looked like. But not seeing or knowing what the world looked like, was so miserable. After all that’s why he was at the hospital, for the second time this month. He comes with the hope that the doctors have found a way for Louis to be able to see again, but he leaves the hospital with all his hopes crushed and shattered into million pieces.

“It’s nice to see you Louis. How have you been?” Dr Harvey asked Louis as they both sat down.

“I’ve been great! Though it’s a boring start on this summer and it doesn’t stop raining” Louis groaned

“Typical weather of England eh? So the reason I asked you to come down so urgently is because there’s a new treatment going on. Scientists and doctors have been working with this treatment for years, and now they’re starting to try it out. Are you interested to hear more about this treatment?”

“But Doctor, how much are the odds that I will be able to see anything? We’ve already tried so many treatments and nothing ever works!” Louis explained frustrated. Dr Harvey sighed and tried once again.

“Louis.. This treatment is different then others. You actually have to go through a surgery and it’s worked for some patients, and for some it hasn’t worked at all. It’s a fifty/fifty chance that you’ll get to see again. Even if this treatment has proven helpful for some patients, there is a risk of serious complications and side effects.”

“What’s the treatment called and how does this work?” Louis asked the doctor carefully.

“The treatment is called Deep Brain Stimulation. Deep Brain Stimulation is a surgical treatment involving the implantation of a medical device called a brain pacemaker, which sends electrical impulses to specific parts of the brain. It’s much more complicated, but short story, we will put electrodes in a specific place in your brain which will stimulate your other senses and help activating the part of the brain to the eyes.” The doctor explained softly.

“If this surgery works, will I be able to see perfectly or will I get blurry images?”

“It depends on the patient and how much your brain will react to this surgery. I can’t promise you anything and it will be a difficult surgery. You need to discuss this with your parents and your family. Let’s book another appointment and you can bring your parents with you so they’ll know fully what the surgery is about. Does that sound good?” Louis nodded and the Doctor went through his calendar, trying to find a time for the next appointment.

“Hmm, I’m free at July 10th, which is exactly in a month. Will you be able to have the appointment then?”

“Yes, but I’m going to be in the US these upcoming weeks with my uncle Will. But I’ll be home earlier so” Louis replied.

“That sounds nice! Isn’t he the uncle who’s a manager to that boyband?”

“Yeah, to One Direction. I don’t know them but hey if I’m going to live the luxury life for free in four weeks, then I’m not complaining.” The doctor chuckled at Louis response.

“Well that doesn’t sound bad at all! You have to enjoy yourself and have fun. The next appointment will be on July 10th, at 10.30 am. I’ll text your parents so they know about this appointment too. It was nice to see you again Louis and I have a nice vacation” The doctor said as he stood up.

Louis stood up too and opened the stick that he was holding. The doctor tapped him on his shoulder reassuringly and led the way out from the hospital. Louis’ family’s butler John was standing outside the hospital, waiting for Louis to finish.

“Good day Mr.Tomlinson, your parents are waiting for you to have dinner at the Balthazar’s.” John said as he opened the door for Louis. Louis sighed as he buckled himself with the belt. As John was driving Louis to the restaurant, he couldn’t help but to feel sympathy for the 19 year old lad. Louis was a good lad indeed, and he surely didn’t deserve to be stuck in this place just because he’s blind. The vacation in the US with his uncle and the boyband hopefully will do Louis some good. Maybe he will smile for real for once, instead of forcing a fake smile on his smile as he always pretended that he was happy when he clearly wasn’t. John wished very well that Louis could find happiness again.

Someone who could save him from his own misery.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again; this chapter hasn't been edited, so I apologize for all the errors.

"Honey, did you pack socks?"

"But mum, you know that I don't wear socks" Louis whined as he flopped down clumsily on his bed.

"I'm just making sure love. Now all your clothes are organized in colors. I've informed Beatrice to pack it up the clothes in an alphabetic order when you arrive. Your pass, your wallet, your phone and your charger are in your handbag. Your-" Louis interrupted his mother as she was ranting.

"Yeah yeah mum, calm down now, you've already told me this stuff three times! If I forget anything I'll just tell Beatrice or John, okay? Now please mum, make me a cuppa!" Louis said.

His mother sighed as she was stressing out once again for nothing. She could trust her son, he's a lovely and an intelligent lad, but she couldn't trust the world. Louis wasn't used to travelling on his own; he's always had his family with him. They've always protected him.

Jay made her way to the kitchen and filled the kettle with water, and then she put it on the stove. After she finished the tea, she poured it down in two cups. She brought the cups to her son's bedroom and walked in. Louis was sitting on his bed, fiddling with his hands over his lap. He clearly heard the noise and he could feel another person's presence in his room. Assuming it was his mother, he smiled, even if he couldn't see her.

Jay smiled towards her son, but she couldn't help the aching pain in her chest every time she saw him. Why does he have to be blind? Why couldn't it be her instead? He doesn't deserve to be blind. He didn't deserve all the bad parts that he has been given in his life. She wished deeply, that she could see him smile genuinely for once, that she could hear his loudly filled laugh that she hasn't heard for years.

She sighed and sat down on the bed, next to her son. She handed the cup of tea carefully to her son, helping him to make out the shape of the cup and warning him that it's still hot. He thanked her silently, but he knew that something was bothering his mother.

"Mom what's wrong?" Louis frowned. Jay chuckled out loudly, and then sighed.

"How do you even know that something is wrong with me?" Jay asked gently. Louis shrugged.

"I don't know, I just can feel it you know? Like a vibe. I often notice your presence which is full of joy, but now you seem down and you're very quiet too" Louis admitted sheepishly.

"I just.. I'm scared boo. You're not used to travelling all on your own. I just don't want you to get hurt. I'm going to miss you so much too" she stated. Louis smile saddened and he gently put the cup down on his desk. Then he reached out his hands, trying to find his mother. He caught her hand and pulled her in his arms. He buried his head in his mother's hair and sighed. She entwined her hands around his waist, and hugged him tightly.

"I'll be alright mum. I'm just one phone call away and I won't get hurt. Okay? Besides Zayn is coming with me and he'll kick anyone's ass if they hurt me. Just like that old neighbor. Now stop worrying, it will give you crinkles!" He chirped and his mother rolled her eyes.

*******

"I'm going to miss you so much boo bear. Don't forget to brush your teeth and always eat the vegetables yeah? Oh don't forget to call me every day, otherwise I'll call you" Jay babbled as she was hugging her son at the airport. Zayn laughed in the background as he thought about how motherly Jay was. She was after all a mother, but she definitely crossed the limits by far.

"Yeah yeah mum, you're gonna crush my bones! I'll miss you too, now please let me breath" Jay huffed out jokingly and let Louis go. She kissed him on the cheek and then hugged Zayn and kissed him on the cheek too.

"Take care of my baby yeah?" Jay asked nervously.

"Of course Mama Jay, I'll always take care of boo bear" Zayn said teasingly. Louis huffed as he hated that nickname. He opened his stick and fixed his glasses. They said their greetings towards Louis mother and then Zayn put his arm around Louis shoulder, leading him to the terminal. The Tomlinson's family butler John, was taking care of the suitcases and Beatrice was taking care of the flight tickets and the passports.

"The gates are now open for Flight BA4589 to Chicago. You may now go to terminal 4. Please have your flight tickets and passport in hand. Thank you."

*******

"LA baby!" Zayn shouted and pulled Louis into a hug.

"Lou, we're in fucking LA. Can you hear the ladies screaming? We're going to have so much fun!" Zayn said excitedly and Louis just nodded.

It's not like Louis can actually go to a club and party. It's not like he can actually hit on a girl, without really hitting her when he stumbles over someone's feet and accidentally push the drink in her hand, all over her. It's not like he can actually go around in LA and enjoy the view of it, because after all he can't see the beautiful city, he can't see the amazing lights or the beautiful people in it. It's not like he can go to Venice beach and enjoy the hot "birds" as Zayn call them. It's not like he can run into the beach, take a swim, laugh and let go for once, because he won't be able to notice the high wave that will hit him. He just wishes for once, that he could actually enjoy himself and be fully aware of what is going on.

Louis heard his name being called and whipped his head in the direction of the sound. Suddenly he's engulfed in a bone crushing hug and he knows by the cologne, which is a bit spicy with a strong smell, that the cologne belongs to no other than his uncle Will.

"Lou, I missed you so much son. How have you been?" Uncle Will asked as he pulled away and tapped Louis reassuringly on his back. Louis smiled and muttered loudly "I'm good". He has missed his uncle very much; he would always make him feel that he was as normal as anyone else.

He remembers when he was 12 years old, and he came home crying. It was that week when people started to use the advantage of Louis being blind. He was torn apart, because he thought they were his classmates and friends after all. Not people who should make fun of him just because he had it more difficult to read and write. Uncle Will was visiting his family at that time, and when Will saw how heartbroken Louis was, he engulfed him in his arms and put him on his lap. Will hugged him and comforted him, until he stopped sobbing. When he calmed down, he ran his hand through his hair and said:

"Being blind might be a flaw, a mistake, something that makes a person not normal and or smart, in other people's eyes. But to be fully honest, it's a unique gift in a way. It's not something to be blessed with, but it's something to be blessed within. We often judge and perform actions, based on what we see with our eyes. The good part with being blind is that you never ever judge a person by your eyes. You judge someone with your heart, which is the only good way to do. We all judge by our eyes, if there's something we don't like or that we don't really approve of, then we judge it, we misunderstand the person or the thing, and we hide from it. We judge a shell, a person's cover, or simply a cover of a book. But we never fully know what the book contains, but yet we judge it based on how it looks. If you're not able to see, then you can judge a book by what it contains, or a person by its personality and beneath its cover. That's what you should embrace Louis. You're unique and special the way you are. That's why we all love you so much. Because you accept us for whom we are. "

Louis never really understood what his uncle meant, until he got older. Yes, he didn't like being blind at all but it had some perks of being it. You accepted everyone for who they are and you only judged them, by their personality and their actions. Not for what they're wearing, or how they look.

"How have you been Lou? How are your parents? Is Lottie still bugging you?" Louis chuckled as he leaned into Zayn's touch even more, as he was leading the way to the car.

"My parents are alright, quite busy with work though. Lottie is still annoying me, but Fizz annoys me even more" Louis huffed.

"I guess that's the perks of being little sisters, huh?" Will asked jokingly. Zayn chuckled. Uncle Will lead them to a black Mercedes, and the driver started to drive them to the private area that One Direction is currently hiding in.

Louis sighed as he leaned back in the seat. He thought about this summer. How will it be? Will it be crappy and boring like all the recent ones? The ones when he had to basically be handcuffed with his family. They would always visit his grandmother and stay with her for a few weeks. She lived in an old cabin, which looked really fancy according to his twin sisters; Phoebe and Daisy. Then afterwards they would spend some boring weeks at his grandmother, they would travel to Paris for a week to visit his aunt Cecilia. So basically all his summers were wasted on travelling and visiting relatives that he hasn't seen since the last summer.

Louis wishes that this summer could be different. That he could smile for once or even laugh genuinely. He wishes that he wouldn't be judged or treated like a little fragile child. He wishes he could at least make a new friend, other than Zayn. It's not that he doesn't enjoy being with Zayn, it's more that Zayn is basically his brother since they were babies. Louis loves him to death and is so grateful for everything that he has done for Louis, but he wishes that he could at least have another friend. He didn't want to be a burden for Zayn anymore. Every time he wanted to do something, then Zayn was his first and last option. Thank God that Zayn has a big generous heart and that we weren't a selfish prick little the other kids in his old school. Thank God he graduated and doesn't have to see the other kids anymore. He didn't have to see the people who bullied him, who hurt him both physically and emotionally, and the teachers who pitied him. Thank God for freedom.

*******

Harry almost snapped when there was a light tap on his shoulder. He clenched his hands into fists as his knuckles went white. He took a deep breath, ran his hand in his hair and put on a fake smile before he turned around. He was met with sky blue eyes and a goofy grin, of course it's Niall.

"Do you want to take a break so we can get some snacks?" Harry smiled and agreed. He put down the pencil on the bunch of papers, which he has been struggling with for almost two hours now. He just couldn't get the chorus right for the song.

He stood up and dusted his pants, sighing heavily as he stretches and his back makes a breaking sound. There was a knock on the door, and inside the room- Liam walked in. He smiled and greeted the other two band members with a nod. He threw his arms around Niall's and Harry's shoulder as he pulled them in an awkward side hug.

"Alright lads, we're done here. Let's go to the kitchen for some snacks" Liam stated.

"Man I'm fucking starving, why did the cunts leave us in this deserted area?" Niall asked and Liam whipped his hand off the back of Niall's head.

"Oy' what was that for?" Niall asked as he rubbed his head. Harry only laughed at those idiots, thinking about the first time they applied to the X Factor together. He is really blessed to be in a band with his two best friends.

*******

He remembered that day when Liam hurried into the living room, looking baffled than ever. He was breathing heavily and he looked so damn nervous. Harry was currently in Niall's home, playing FIFA when they heard Liam approach them. When they saw him, they stopped the game and sat up straight, scared of what might have happened.

"Liam mate are you alright?" Harry asked as he stood up and put his hands reassuringly on Liam's shoulders. Liam looked terrified, like a little scared puppy. He started pacing in the room and then suddenly, he stopped.

"I've made a terrible mistake, I'm such a bad friend, I lied to you guys and I used you, I didn't even ask you about it" He rambled as Niall put his hand over Liam's mouth, hushing him.

"Man slow down, stop talking gibberish and talk slowly" Niall asked. Liam nodded and sat down. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He opened his eyes and looked at his best friends Niall and Harry. Would they leave him because he did this?

He sighed and pushed the bad thoughts away. He nodded for himself and took another deep breath.

"So you guys know that X Factor show?" Liam asked nervously. They both nodded.

"I might or not have applied us all for the audition, as a band" He said out fast.

"WHAT?" Niall screamed and stood up abruptly. Suddenly a loud whack was heard. Niall had just hit Harry on his forehead.

"Oy' what the hell was that for?" Harry yelled as he rubbed his forehead. Niall bit his under lip, because hell he couldn't even explain why he did what he just did.

"I'm sorry Harry, I don't know why I did it, but I'm freaking out" Niall whined as he sat down and put his head in his hands.

"Okay so you applied for us right?" Harry asked and Liam nodded.

"Well what did they say?"

"Um that's the bad part. I never thought they would accept us as we all are still 16 years old, we're young and we're still going in school and I'm so sorry, you are now allowed to hit me, but please not the face" Liam shrieked as he protected his face. Niall started laughing and soon they all were laughing out loudly.

"So I guess we're auditioning for X Factor huh?" Harry asked. Liam looked up surprised at him, as Harry didn't seem mad or annoyed.

"Wait, you guys want to go? I thought you hated to perform in front of people"

"It's cool with me, Simon is a hell cool dude and Cheryl is fit as hell" Niall admitted. Harry nodded and agreed.

"You guys are serious? You're not mad at me? Wait what's going on right now?" Liam asked dumbfounded.

"Well if we miss school, then I'm in" Niall cheered out loudly. Harry agreed.

Niall, Harry and Liam found themselves in Harry's basement some hours afterwards, going through a lot of songs and practicing their songs. They decided that they wanted to audition with a song that they've written personally. The song would match their voices better and they didn't like all the pop crap that was blasting out of the radios nowadays.  
They sat down in the basement for hours. Going through every song that they ever has written and desperately trying to find the perfect song to audition for. They were exhausted. They were knackered. But when the clock passed midnight and it became an early morning on a rainy Saturday, Niall suddenly stood straight up and grinned.

"I found the perfect song!" He cheered.

He picked a song they wrote about self esteem. He chose Little Things.


	4. Chapter 4

Harry stared into the empty arena, thinking about how it’s going to be filled with twenty five thousand screaming girls in some hours. He closed his eyes, and as he did so, faint screams of teenage girls filled his head.

It sounded so real. It felt so real.

He opened them again, and he was met with an empty crowd. He sighed loudly as he hunched himself down, sprawling himself down on the cold hard floor. He looked up at the huge ceiling, which was decorated with huge spotlights. He looked around the arena, and he saw the crew working with the sound.

They all had it figured out. They all didn’t know what will happen in the future, but yet they were comfortable with it and accepted it. They weren’t scared to mess up or to do something wrong, they would get over it. But for Harry it was different. He was scared, more like terrified of the future. He was terrified to mess up, to do something wrong, to make a mistake because he knew he would get judged for it.

It wouldn’t matter if he messed up on a song and later apologized, he would still get judged for it and it would haunt him for months. It wouldn’t matter if he said something wrong; he would get laughed at and judged for it by the world. It would be easier for him to not be famous; he could’ve done so much wrong and yet not be judged by anyone. But he’s famous now; the entire world knows who he is.

“Harry Styles; the cheeky lad from Chesire, who hooks up with every living piece on this earth”

Did people actually believe all the crap that media said? That he hooks up with at least three different girls every single night? That he’s “easy” to get? That he’s a player? That he breaks every girl’s heart and doesn’t give a flying fuck about anyone?

It was so messed up. How could people, believe everything that was said or written in the media? Thank God for his true fans; they really knew and stated that everything the media said was bullshit. They even made analysis about how he’s bisexual or homosexual, that’s why he never settled down with a girl. Plus the entire One Direction fandom, for a weird reason, wished that all the boys were homosexual and it would be a bonus, if they would have a threesome with each other.

Harry snapped out of his thoughts as he heard two muffled voices becoming louder and louder. He turned his head a bit to the left and spotted Liam and Niall approaching him with grins. Niall walked faster and suddenly jumped in Harry’s lap so that he was straddling him, with his legs thrown over on each side of Harry’s stomach.

“Oi’ Haz, what’s you doing mate?” Niall asked with sparkling eyes. Harry huffed and tried to push the irish lad off his lap.

“Get off me Ni”

“What? Did you just say that I should sit in a comfortable place? Aw thanks Hazza, you’re truly gentlemen” Niall joked as he wiggled himself on Harry’s lap and made himself comfortable.

“Twat” Harry stated as he gave up in surrender. Niall only laughed as Liam came and sat down next to them.

“Will is going to be here soon, isn’t that great?” Liam asked smiling  
.  
“What’s so great about a manager coming back ya cunt?” Niall asked as he face palmed him. Liam only scrunched his face and said:

“But he’s nice and I’m sure he’s only strict because it’s for our best” he crossed his arms over his chest huffing jokingly. The boys only laughed. Liam and Niall sprawled themselves down on their backs, right next to Harry. A comfortable silence settled down between them, as they all were gazing at the ceiling.

“Do you remember when we met?” Harry asked quietly.

“Sure mate, you tried to steal my cookie at the kindergarten and I bit your hand as punishment” Niall chuckled.

“I remember that, you were quite mean Nialler, you pushed me down the swings once because I didn’t share my lunch with you” Liam stated.

“What can I say, a man has his needs” Niall said proudly as he grinned.

“Do you miss the old times, like when we weren’t famous and had all this?” Harry asked.

“No” the boys chorused immediately without thinking.

“I mean sure I miss the privacy, but this has been our dream since we were little kids” Liam admitted.

“Ye I wouldn’t take this back at all if I could” Niall said with his thick Irish accent.

Harry only nodded and another silence settled down between them. It wasn’t that Harry regretted becoming famous or an idol for many million girls. He just wished that he could be happy like old times, that he could do whatever and still smile afterwards no matter how big he messed up or how much he failed with some specific stuff. He just wanted to smile again, a real honest smile. He wanted to be happy. He wanted to feel needed by his nearest. He wanted to feel loved and like he wasn’t lonely in this massive world.

A throat was cleared and he looked up surprised. Liam was holding his hand out and looking at him with a worried glance. Harry noticed that Niall was no longer at the stage.

“C’mon mate, we’re off to the dressing rooms”

*******

“Great show boys, I’ll meet you here in 5 minutes, hurry up!” Paul shouted.

The three boys hurriedly speed walked to their dressing room to change from their sweaty scene clothes to something clean. They opened the door and abruptly took off their shirts, taking a small towel and drying their body parts fast. Caroline, their stylist, threw some new shirts and pants to the three boys.

“Great show mates” Liam said and patted Niall and Harry on their backs, as they were heading out to backstage, looking cleaner than some minutes before. They thanked him with a grin and told him the same thing back. They spotted Paul and Preston, two of their bodyguards, standing backstage and waiting for them to arrive.

“C’mon boys, we’re going directly to the tour buses. No stops at all”

“But Paul tha-“Liam was interrupted by Paul.

“Now is not the time Liam. We have to head straight back to the bus, so we can leave.” Paul replied sternly as he led them to the back entrance.

As the doors to the back entrance were opened, Harry was dazzled by all the flashes from the cameras. You would think that after 2 years of being pop stars that he should be used to the flashing lights and cameras basically being shoved in front of his face, but he wasn’t. He wasn’t used to all the screaming fans either, hell he wasn’t used to have one single fan. Security guards blocked the fans out of the way, as they led the three famous band members into the tour bus. 

Harry immediately went to his bunk and put on some comfortable clothes instead. Anxiety was rising slowly; his breathing became shallow and faster, as memories from the accident were running through his mind. He grunted and closed his eyes, with the hope to calm down. He went to his suitcase and opened the small pocket. He pulled out the small box of the pills. He picked up the Benzodiazepines pills and took two pills. He shrugged them down fast as he melded it with water. Soon he started to feel drowsy and sleepy, so he crawled into his bunk and a black image overtook his view.

“Oi Haz, wake up, we’re here” an Irish voice yelled happily.

Harry only grunted and flopped himself to the other side, so that he was facing the wall. He fell asleep last night, but immediately it wasn’t a good sleep. He woke up several times during the night, panting and all sweaty as those horrible memories were haunting him in his dreams. Why couldn’t he forget that dammit accident?

He sat up and ran his hand through his hair, grunting as he felt how greasy his hair was. He stood up and stretched, then put on some old Ramones shirt and some black skinnies. He grabbed his lighter and the cigarettes as he walked to the living room. Liam was sitting on the couch, watching TV as he spotted Harry with the fags again. He sighed, as he didn’t want to put up another stupid fight and argue about why Harry should stop smoking, since it isn’t healthy for him.

“Morning” Harry grumbled as he opened the small window, and sat down next to it. He brought the cigarette to his mouth and lighted the end of it, and inhaled deeply as he let the taste hit his mouth. He exhaled some seconds later, sighing as he felt exhausted.

“Y’know those are going to kill you one day” Liam said. Harry only rolled his eyes, as he turned his attention to the window. He stared out from the window, wishing that he could have a beer in his hand right now. A beer would definitely be amazing right now.

“What’s the plan for today?” Niall asked as he flopped down next to Liam, throwing his legs over Liam’s lap.

“Well since we don’t have any shows until two weeks, management decided to let us stay somewhere in a private area so no fans would have the chance to disturb us.” Liam admitted.

“Wait we have a break?” Harry asked dumbfounded. No one has told him about them having a break from the tour now. Liam scratched the back of his neck and looked at Harry guilty.

“Sorry mate, but management made me promise not to tell you about this, since they’re scared that you’d run away again to party” Harry rolled his eyes and grumbled something that sounded like a curse. 

After a while, the boys stepped out of the bus. Their jaws dropped as they looked at the huge house, which looked like a modern castle. The garden was really huge as well and you could spot a pool area in the back.

“Nice to see you boys” someone said and snapped the boys out of their thoughts. They turned around, smiling as they faced Will and two strangers next to him. Liam walked towards them and gave Will a hug, and so did Niall. Harry only nodded as a greeting with his lips pressed into a tight frown.

“Hello mate nice to meet you, I’m Liam” Liam said as he pulled his hands forward and shook his hand with Zayn.

“I’m Zayn” Zayn greeted as he shook their hands. At the end he put his hand out, to shake Harry’s hand, but he only glared at him with a disapproving look. Zayn dropped his hand and Liam gave him an apologetic look.

As Liam took his hand forward to introduce himself to Louis, Louis didn’t react. He was still staring at the ground. It wasn’t like Louis was shy, but he had no idea where they were exactly standing so it would be embarrassing if he did something wrong.

“Pal are you well?” Niall asked Louis with a curious look. Zayn nudged Louis shoulder gently.

“Yeah, I’m Louis by the way” he said.

“Isn’t it too cloudy to wear sun glasses right now?” Harry said with a smirk as he crossed his arms over his chest, muffling a laugh. Liam only glared at Harry, mentally begging him to shut the fuck up.

“Perhaps it is, but I can’t really know that since I can’t see “Louis snapped. It wasn’t his intentions to snap, but he has been made fun of before and he could sense that this was the beginning of another prank.

“Huh, of course you can’t see, you’re wearing sun glasses stupid” Harry snapped back.

“I’m fucking blind” Louis stated finally and the group immediately went quiet. An awkward silence was settled down between the groups, as Zayn was glaring at Harry, ready to punch his pretty face already. Liam and Niall were glancing with a pitiful look at Louis.

“Well you look like a fucking twat, so maybe you deserve being blind” Harry snapped as he brushed next to Louis, hitting his shoulder a bit, speed walking into the house.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off; this is the shittiest chapter I've ever written. There's also some self harming in the chapter, so be aware!
> 
> Second off; I've already uploaded 11 chapters on wattpad, though nothing is edited but if you'd like to read those chapters, here's the link- http://www.wattpad.com/story/5920474-the-blind-side-a-larry-stylinson-fanfiction
> 
> Enjoy:)

An awkward silence settled down in the room, as the only noises that were heard were when the boys were chewing and swallowing. All five lads decided to eat dinner together in the living room, so they could get to know each other better. Since Harry was the best cook of them all, he decided to be a stubborn ass and not do anything. So their last solution was to order some pizza. They were all sitting on the couches, Liam and Niall on the big couch, Harry in the love seat, and Louis and Zayn right next to each other on the other big couch. The television was on and it was showing the game between Brasil and Spain.

”C’mon Torres! Show ’em who the boss is!”Niall screamed as he stood up and cheered as they made a goal.

Liam, Zayn and Niall were very intrigued in the game as they were rooting for Spain. Louis wished that he could watch the game, since it sounds fun and he was very curious about how the game really goes. Zayn had tried many times to explain what the game is about, but he can’t really imagine it inside his head. He stood up and took his stick. He told the boys that he was going out to the balcony for some air. As he led the way, he finally arrived at his final destination and he slid the doors open. The cold air hit his face as a shiver made up on his spine. He stepped out and closed the door. With the help of his stick, he found an empty chair and sat down.  
Louis sighed as he suddenly didn’t feel so suffocated like when he was inside the house. A throat was cleared, he jumped up a bit and his head snapped up, as he was trying to find the direction that the stranger was in.

“Who’s there?” He croaked out, a bit terrified. Someone chuckled and walked closer towards Louis.

“Relax asshole, I won’t hurt you” Louis recognized the voice as Harry’s. He scoffed up at the comment and crossed his arms over his chest.

“I’m not scared of you” Louis huffed.

“Oh really? Why did you jump up like that then?” Harry asked with a smirk plastered on his face.

“Well you dumbass since I can’t see, what do you really expect of me?” Harry hummed and tapped his chin with his finger. He sat down next to Louis, and pulled out a cigarette. He lighted the end up, as the tobacco made it through his mouth. He sighed and melted down next to the chair.

“You know, it must suck being blind. But it’s good in a way, because you don’t have to look at yourself in the mirror every day. That’s a positive thing.” Harry chirped.

Louis felt the anger rise and his cheeks heating up of fury. How dare that bastard say something like that? How dare he judge him and make conclusions, about what’s good and bad for him? If he didn’t hate Harry before, he sure as hell hated him now more than ever.

“You know what Harold, I would happily sit down and rant about what an asshole you are but I’m not going to waste my time on speaking about you. But let me tell you one thing; you’re scared, aren’t you? You’re scared about getting judged or feeling like an out caster, that’s why you’re such an ass and you pick on other weak people. But I’m not going to let you do that towards me. I feel sorry for you.” Louis stated as he stood up. Harry glared at the older boy, as he felt like he has been hit by a truck and that his walls had been shattered into million pieces. He picked his dignity up and said:

“At the end of the day, you’re the one who looks like ugly as fuck and you’re the one being blind. Sucks to be you pal”

“At least at the end of the day, I won’t be the one who's lonely and hated. Sucks to be you pal.” Louis responded and made his way inside to his bedroom.

*******

Harry sat down on his bed, trembling with fear. Every word that Louis said, he was right about it. He thought about how he started picking on other people after that stupid accident; the accident that changed his life. His hands trembled and he kept scratching the back of his hand. His lip quivered as his mind was filled with thoughts about the future. About how he’s going to fail and how he’s going to be all alone. He wouldn’t have anyone. Just like his parents left him, everyone else is going to walk out of his life without looking back. There was no reason to stay. He was pathetic, worthless, a waste of space. Why was he even alive? Scenes of the day before the accident played in his head, just like a sneak peak of a movie

“Mum, dad, I have something to tell you” 14 year old Harry said as they were sitting at the dinner table. He was fumbling nervously with the hem of his shirt. His mother and father glanced at him with a smile, nodding and telling him to go on.

“I’m gay” as he whispered those words, his life became a hell. Instead of expecting his parents to tell him it’s okay and that they still loved him, he got the worst. He looked up at his father’s eyes which were furring and then at his mother’s face, which was red with an angry look plastered on her face. 

“Is this some kind of joke?” She screeched. He felt tears prickling at the back of his eyes as he shook his head.

“Get out! No son of mine is a stupid faggot! Get out of my house, you son of Satan!” Robin screamed as he dragged Harry up with pulling his hair, pushing him on the floor.

“I hope you root in hell!” he kicked his step son on his head, as Harry blanked into a black unconscious world.

He stumbled out of the bed, running his hand through his hair as he made his way to the bedroom. He went to the small box hidden behind the sink in the bathroom. He opened it and fingered the cold metal blade. He pulled his shirt over his head and fell to the floor, so he was sitting. He took the blade to the top of his chest just low enough that no one would see it; he let the blade ghost the line he has gone to make before letting it actually appear. He let the blade into his flesh, slicing the skin open so that a soft flow of red flowed out. The red dripped down his stomach, he quickly removed his trousers. He sat in his boxers' red dripping down his stomach and blade at the ready, he slides the blade down his thigh feeling the skin open. He moaned slightly as the cold floor cooled the cut, so that it gave him shivers. His eye leas fluttered closed and he just sat, enjoying the sting on is flesh.

That's when the door opens with a soft click and he cursed himself for not locking it, how long must he have been in here? His eyes snapped open to see Liam closing the door and walking in. Immediately he puts his shirt over the newly made mark and hides the blade. Liam frowned as he looked at him curiously. He looked like a deer that just got caught.

“Harry? Are you okay?” Harry nodded.

“You don’t seem okay. Do you want to talk?” Liam asked gently as he walked closer to Harry. Harry shook his head and held the shirt tighter, as he looked down at the white blanket. A red spot was there. His eyes widened and he tried to hide the spot, but before he even had time to do that, Liam snatched the blanket from his hand and looked at with a frown.

“Why is there blood on your blanket?”

“I had a nose bleed” Harry croaked out. Liam didn’t believe him at all, but he didn’t want to make Harry upset, so he only nodded and bent down so that he was at eye level with him. He closed his eyes and pressed his lips gently on Harry’s temple.

“Good night Hazza” Liam whispered as he walked out from the door, closing the door carefully.

“Good night Li” Harry whispered as he felt tears falling down his cheeks.

He made his way to the bedroom and cleaned the new wound, as he threw his shirt into the laundry. He pulled off his black jeans and let them be on the floor. He made his way to his bed, as he was only wearing briefs. With a shaky sigh, he tucked himself in under the blankets and embraced himself. Tears poured down his face as his lip was quivering. He croaked out a shaky sob and put his hand over his mouth, trying to muffle the sound of his sobbing.

Why was life so unfair?


	6. Chapter 6

Louis pulled the covers over his head when he heard the loud banging on the door. It felt like he just went to sleep ten minutes ago and was already woken up. The banging didn’t stop, and soon he heard the door click.

”Rise and shine boo bear” Zayn shouted as he ran into Louis' room. He saw a lump under the duvets. He made his way to the bed and counted silently to three, and then he pulled the duvets off and started jumping on the bed.

“Fucking twat, leave me alone” Louis grumbled as he tried to pull the duvet over himself again, but he failed as he couldn’t reach it with his hands.

“C’mon boo bear, it’s a new day and we’re in fucking LA! You can sleep as much as you want later, but c’mon now” He groaned as Zayn pulled Louis up into a sitting position with his hands. Zayn made his way to the wardrobe and pulled a pair of jeans and a blue shirt. He grabbed the shirt and pulled it on top of Louis head, as Louis groaned. It was always something that Zayn did; he took care of Louis like a mother, when Louis’ real mother wasn’t around. Louis hated it, he hated to be treated like a child, but he knew that Zayn only wanted his best. He did those things because he loved him like a brother. He grew up with him and their mothers were best friends.

*******  
He remembers the first day he changed schools; he only did it because he was bullied due to his religion view. His parents insisted that he has to change to a private school, where he will be treated like any ten year old kid. He became quite popular the first day, perhaps it was because of his sense of fashion or that he knew how to style his hair perfectly. The girls started clinging to him and the guys wanted to hang with him.

One day he walked into the canteen and he heard chanting. He noticed a large group surrounding a kid that was crawling on the floor. He approached them quickly to see what was going on, it was that day that he met Louis Tomlinson for the first time.

“What’s going on?” Zayn asked Ryan, one of the older guys that he was friends with.

“The blind kid lost his glasses, isn’t that hilarious?” Ryan chuckled as Zayn looked dumbfounded. He walked closer and saw a short guy, crawling on the floor, searching for his glasses. His stick was next to him, broken into two halves. Tears were pouring down silently from his blue eyes, down his cheek. His lips were trembling, but yet he didn’t make a sound of crying or sobbing. Zayn looked around, glaring at the crowd as they were laughing and pointing to this poor kid.

“What’s wrong Tomlinson, can’t find your glasses?” One of the big guys said as he crossed his arms over his chest, grinning like an idiot.

“Please give them back” the young kid on the floor pleaded.

Suddenly a breaking noise was heard, as the big guy stepped on the glasses, twirling with his foot to break it and shatter the glasses into pieces. The crowd around the boy chanted louder and laughed louder, cracking like it was the funniest thing they’ve ever seen. The boys trembled more and sat down in the middle, pulling his knees to his chest and muffling his ears with his hands; trying subtly to ignore the cruel comments and the laughs. Zayn couldn’t handle it anymore; he stepped in the centrum, standing next to the boy.

“Malik hit him and show him who the boss is!” One of the crowds shouted. He glared at the person and shook his head.

“What the hell is wrong with you people? How can you be so mean?” He asked loudly. The crowd became silent, gazing at Zayn and wondering what he was up too.

“I’m so disgusted, how can you treat a kid like this? How would you feel if you were in his position ha?” Zayn asked as he glared at the crowd. The poor kid brought his knees tighter to his chest and hugged them closer, as he hid his face between his knees.

“C’mon mate, let’s go” Zayn said as he crouched down next to the trembling kid. He flinched at first when Zayn put his hand on his shoulder, but relaxed later when Zayn whispered silently in his ear:

“I’m not going to hurt you, you can trust me”

Louis was suspicious at first, what if this stranger would lie and pull a prank on him? He pushed the thoughts away and decided to trust this stranger. If he would pull another prank on him, it wouldn’t be a huge difference. He has been bullied, he has been called names, and he has been beaten and used as the clown for this huge school. So it wouldn’t make any difference for him at all.  
Slowly and hesitantly he pushed his head up and pushed his hand out of the stranger to take. Zayn grabbed his hand and pulled him up with him. He put his hand on Louis back, protecting him and leading the way for him to the nurses. Louis leaned a bit closer towards Zayn and found warm and safeness heating from the embrace. He rubbed his eyes, trying to make the tears go away. He put his hands in the front, trying to see that nothing was blocking him so he wouldn’t trip or fall. Zayn noticed this and grabbed Louis’ hand, entangling their fingers together.

“Don’t worry, I got you” Zayn whispered as he pulled Louis closer. Louis flushed as he was speechless. No one has ever stood up for him and protected him; he wasn’t used to this at all.

“What’s your name?” Zayn asked and Louis noticed the Bradford accent that he had.

“Louis” He whispered as he ducked his head down, flustering as he wasn’t used to making new friends or speaking with students in his school at all. They were often ashamed of him or speaking with him, since he was blind and he couldn’t really do anything. He couldn’t play in the garden with them, or play after school or anything, without bringing his mum along.

“Nice to meet you Louis, I’m Zayn”

*******

“Lou mate hello” Zayn waved his hands in front of Louis’ face, and Louis snapped out of his thoughts.

“Sorry”

“You zoned out on me man, what’s going on?” Zayn asked worriedly.

“Nothing, don’t worry, I’m just tired” he lied.

“So guess what we’re going to do today?” Zayn asked with a grin.

“I’m too tired to guess, just tell me already” Louis replied.

“We’re going sightseeing and sunbathing today, in a fancy boat” Zayn wiggled his eyebrows.

“So? It’s not like I’ll be able to see my tan” Louis snapped harshly, regretting it seconds later when he heard Zayn sighing.

“C’mon boobear don’t be like that”

“Ah you mean not to be blind, excuse me for not being able to use my eyes” Louis said harshly.

“Just get dressed and meet me outside” Zayn sighed and made his way outside.

It wasn’t like Louis actually meant to snap and it wasn’t like he was mad at Zayn, because Zayn hadn’t done him any wrong. But he was so tired, so damn exhausted of doing stuff that he couldn’t really enjoy or actually know what exactly he was doing. It was so exhausting for him. He just wished he could see. To see the world, his surroundings and see what the world is like. To be able to see himself and to know what he looks like. He couldn’t do anything right now about it, he felt worthless and useless. He just was old boring Louis Tomlinson- the kid who was blind. The kid who couldn’t see anything. The kid who never had a girlfriend. The kid who has never been kissed. The kid who never truly had a friend except Zayn. The kid who got bullied, beaten and hated even by his own father. There’s nothing he could really do, he could only accept it and move on.

Louis sighed and ran his hand through his hair. After he tugged his pants on and brushed his teeth, he opened the door and stepped outside. As soon as he closed the door and turned around, ready to walk, he stepped into a hard brick or more like a hard chest. He stumbled back and was ready to fall, when two huge arms engulfed his waist and pulled him tightly to the stranger’s chest. Louis hands automatically found their place on the stranger’s chest and he could feel bare skin, meaning that the stranger was shirtless. Louis blushed immediately and tried to steady himself.

“I’m so sorry I didn’t watch where I was going” Louis apologized. The stranger chuckled and Louis felt like this was déjà vu in some weird way.

“Of course you didn’t watch where you were going, you’re freaking blind” a husky low voice said. Louis realized that it was Harry that he had stumbled into, and immediately pushed himself off him, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Wow what a surprise” Louis said as he felt anger rising inside himself.

“So twat next time use your stick or whatever, before you walk into someone else and gets your ass kicked” Harry snorted and walked away.

“Whatever man” Louis huffed.


	7. Chapter 7

Of fucking course, just when he needs his cigarettes as the most, he forgets the pack in his bedroom. It's not like he can ask Liam or Niall for a cigarette since they despise smoking, so he was screwed. He stormed to Liam and Niall as they were settling down on the boat, organizing their stuff. He slouched down at the sunbed in the end, wearing a pair of shorts and a tank top. He scowled as Liam looked at him curiously, wondering why his mood was so down and why the hell he was still wearing clothes when it was so sunny.

"What?" Harry snapped. Liam put his hands up in the air in defense, backing a bit.

"Nothing, calm down mate. Why are you so pissed?" Liam asked him softly.

"I fucking forgot my cigarettes and I hate this boat already"

"Relax mate" Niall told him as he put his hand over his shoulder. Harry tensed and brushed him off immediately without feeling any guilt.

"Don't touch me" He snapped. He crossed his arms over his chest, taking a deep breath with the hope to calm down.   
Niall smiled apologetically at him, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly and feeling guilty- even if he didn't do anything wrong. He couldn't help it. Niall missed his mate very deeply; they used to be the three musketeers but now it only feels that Harry is fading away from them. There's nothing they can do to stop him from fading away, or to get the old Harry back. He needs to be saved and they want to know so badly, what the reason was that he changed so drastically. Was it something that they did or said? Was it something that happened?

"What's up?" Zayn said as he walked to the lads, with Louis walking slowly in the back. They both were shirtless as it was too hot to wear a shirt.

"Hello mate" Liam waved as he pulled off his shirt. He settled down on a sunbed in the middle between Niall and Zayn. Louis sat down on the empty sunbed between Zayn and Harry. 

A small conversation was started by the lads, having Louis only saying yes or no when a question was directed to him. He didn't like to socialize around strangers, so he always hid behind his glasses. He wished he would've been swallowed by the earth as he didn't feel comfortable at all, having all these questions thrown at him. Questions that were meant for normal people, not people with flaws and a blindness dysfunction. 

He would always shut himself off; he didn't want to be a burden. It didn't matter which stranger was speaking with him; he always felt like the stranger felt obligated to speak with him. Which wasn't necessary at all, since he liked being alone. Being alone was his favorite thing in the world, since no soul could judge him and he could do whatever he wanted to do and say whatever he wanted to say and think whatever he wanted to think. Complete freedom and complete silence. 

"Haz why are you still wearing your shirt? It's boiling hot" Niall stated. Harry tensed a bit and then shrugged it off.

"Mind your own business" He snapped. Niall looked shocked for a bit but then shrugged it off awkwardly. He wasn't shocked about Harry's behavior or that he just snapped at Niall without any reason, he was more shocked and curious about why Harry was so tense about this subject. Since when did he have a problem with being shirtless?

"Just tryin' to look out for you mate" Niall insisted. Harry rolled his eyes and put his glasses on. It was a tense silence between the lads, but Liam decided to break it.

"Who's up for some swimming?" 

"I'll join you" Niall replied.

"I'll watch, I'm not into swimming so much" Zayn scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. The three lads stood up and walked to the other side of the boat silently, glancing back from time to time to Louis and Harry.

An awkward silence was settled down between Harry and Louis, as they were laying on the sunbeds right next to each other. They could feel the heat of each others skin as the sunbeds were very close, but they didn't mention anything about it.

"So..How are you feeling today?" Louis asked awkwardly as he was trying to start a conversation. Harry only snorted but decided to reply anyway.

"Great, now I'm actually perfect, it's all rainbows and suns" Harry snapped sarcastically. Louis frowned.

"Wow chill man, I was just trying to be polite" he stated.

"How about you leave me the fuck alone?" Harry hissed.

"What's your problem? What the fuck did I ever do to you? Is it because I'm blind? Well excuse me for not being able to fix it, I know I'm not fucking perfect but why do you hate me so much?!" 

Louis snapped as he sat up, fuming with anger. Harry was baffled, he didn't expect Louis to snap like that. Of course he didn't hate him, he had no reason to do that. He actually hated everyone and everything. He hated how everyone was so damn happy all the time, how people could smile and laugh every fucking single day, he hated how they never worried or were terrified of the world. He hated how they got the good parts of life, when life was throwing the bad parts to him over and over again. It wasn't fair at all. It was so damn unfair. 

"I don't hate you" Harry admitted quietly.

"Then what is it? What's the problem?" Louis asked. Harry gulped as he felt like a child again, with a wetness on the back of his eyes.

"It has nothing to do with you, I'm just the way I am" Harry stated.

"That's complete rubbish, you can't be this angry at the world without any reason, what are you so afraid of that you decide to push everyone away?" Louis found himself asking softly.

Harry sighed and decided to not reply. It wasn't like he wanted to be rude and not answer, but he didn't owe this Louis kid anything. He wasn't obligated either to tell him the truth or to rant about what a shitty life he has. He definitely didn't want to speak about feeling the urge to feel his skin ripping apart and blood dripping down. Definitely not. He didn't owe him anything. Harry broke out of his thoughts when he heard teeth chattering. He frowned and looked at Louis. Louis was shivering even if he just put on a shirt.

"Are you cold?" Harry asked softly. Louis nodded and embraced himself tighter.

"Why didn't you bring a jacket?"

"It's sunny, I didn't think I would be freezing" Louis replied. Harry sighed as he already felt guilty enough for letting him think that he hated him.

"Come here" Harry said and shuffled his sunbed right next to Louis.

"What?" Louis frowned. Harry rolled his eyes and put his hands on Louis waist. Louis gasped at the sudden touch and was more confused than ever. Harry pulled Louis towards him and embraced his arms around his waist, so that Louis was laying his head on Harry's chest awkwardly.

"What are you doing?" Louis asked hesitantly.

"I'm trying to warm you up"

"By sleeping with me?" Harry snorted.

"In your dreams dumbass, I'm trying to warm you up with body heat" Harry replied. 

"But you hate me" Louis said frowning.

"I don't hate you, you're just annoying as fuck. Now shut up and cuddle with me, and don't you dare tell a soul about this" Harry said with a tight jaw. 

Confused as ever, Louis nodded hesitantly and put his hands around Harry's waist, snuggling into him closer. Even if they basically despised each other, Louis was cold and this was his only solution for body heat. He snuggled tighter as Harry pulled him tighter to his chest. With his head on Harry's chest, with tangled legs together and an increasing body heat- Louis suddenly felt okay and safe for once in his life. He closed his eyes and soon sleep overcome his, taking his mind into the land of dreams.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Forgot about this site! Anyways chapter 13 will be on wattpad in an hour- http://www.wattpad.com/32110646-the-blind-side-a-larry-stylinson-fanfiction
> 
> Enjoy:)

"Shut up Ni!"

"But I didn't say anything"

"You breath out really loudly, so be quiet or you'll wake them up"

Louis shifted around, grumbling to the loud noises that were made. He groaned as his eyes fluttered open. It didn't really matter if his eyes were closed or opened; he couldn't see nothing. It wasn't really black that he saw, he just saw nothing. As he has total blindness, the body does not use the visual sensory part of the brain. Just like a single candle can both defy and define the darkness; so can Louis.

Even if he doesn't have the power to see or to guide himself through life with his eyes, he still has the light inside him which defines who he is. Even if his life is in total blackness, there's still that light beneath him that keeps screaming and rooting for him to not give up. That light is like a guidance for him, a light that can save a life from its own misery buried in the dark. 

"Can you shut the fuck up?" 

Louis snapped his eyes open to the raspy voice, that weirdly enough was very loud and near to himself. He tried to shift around but he felt his body being entangled in tightly with a another body. He blushed as he remembered the past events that happened a few hours... Or maybe it was one hour ago.

"Sorry Haz, but we're back and you need to get up" Liam replied softly.

Harry grunted and looked around. The sun was settling down, as it was briefly colder and windier. Liam grabbed his backpack, and trailed after Zayn and Niall whom were getting off the boat. As he felt that someone tugged at the end of his shirt, he looked down and were met with a pair of the lightest blue eyes he has ever seen. It wasn't the beauty of Louis' eyes that got him trapped; it was the blankness and the darkness that was beneath his eyes. 

It was like he could see his soul by looking right into his eyes, flashing at him wide open. Bluer and brighter than the sea itself, yet so dazzling and it still felt so cold too stare at him like this. It felt so dark. Harry couldn't even feel his pain anymore, he was too overcome by the darkness and the raw emotions that were reflected by this stranger called Louis. 

"Your eyes are so blue" Harry blurted out.

"What?" Louis asked confused.

"Your eyes.. They're really blue"

"Oh" Louis admitted. He wanted to say something, to give a cheeky reply back or a sarcastic comeback, but he couldn't because he didn't even know what blue was or what it looked like or felt like. Sure, he knew it was a color. The color of the sea, of the heaven, but most importantly the color of his eyes. But he really didn't know what it actually was or meant. It was a word. A word and a an adjective that you can use to describe a thing or a person with. But what was really blue? Was it something important, something essential or something that often was used to define a beautiful thing with?

"So can you like untangle yourself from me?" Harry asked hesitantly. 

He didn't want to be rude but yet he didn't want to be nice to this complete stranger either. Yes, he allowed him to cuddle with him only to let Louis become warm. It wasn't a benefit for Harry, it wasn't like Harry liked the feeling when their bodies were all entangled with each other or that he found fondness for the first time ever in so many years. It wasn't like he enjoyed being in this tangled and lost into someone's embracement, it wasn't like he felt safe and a bit fluttery inside. It wasn't like laying here in a boat with him, made Harry feel complete. Not to mention that he didn't have any horrible nightmares or more like memories, for the first time in what feels like ages. But it was totally like that. 

Louis shifted away from Harry, and slowly he stood up and steadied himself. He searched for his cane but unfortunately, luck wasn't in his favor today. He couldn't find it and neither could he spot it. He sighed and hesitated before he asked out shyly.

"Can you hand me my cane? I can't find it" Harry smirked and smiled playfully, but then his smile faded down abruptly. 

It was a weird feeling, he had this weird feeling inside him. In one way he wanted to laugh and put his foot in front of Louis, so that he could trip and hurt himself. Harry would definitely enjoy that and have a good laugh for some seconds. But there was something inside him that made him feel sympathy for the older lad. Like a twist in his stomach, he wanted to stand up and hug the older lad and explain to him that Zayn accidentally took the cane with him. It was weird and so confusing to feel like this. A part of him wanted to do the right thing but another part of him wanted to do the wrong thing, which in Harry's case would actually be the right thing, even if it's completely wrong and stupid.

"I think I saw your friend with the cane" Harry explained. Louis sighed and nodded. He started walking, using his hands to guide him slowly. He put his hands on the edge, thinking that it was the staircase for him to step on to walk off the boat, but that only made him trip. Before he could feel the pain or feel that the air was pushed out of his lungs harshly, two huge hands grabbed his waist from behind, pulling him back into someone's hard chest.

"Are you out of your mind?" Harry whisper-yelled. His mouth was right next to Louis left ear, and as he spoke he couldn't help but shiver at the near contact.

"I..I thought it was the steps" Harry grunted and rolled his eyes.

"Whatever, just make sure that you walk off without drowning yourself" He snapped.

Louis nodded, immediately feeling so childish and stupid. Harry let go of his waist and pushed him gently a bit to the left. He put his hands in front of him, trying to walk correctly without tripping or accidentally falling off the boat only to get himself drowned, no Louis was a wise lad who has to make sure that he can at least walk without that stupid cane.

As he took his next steps, he was utterly confused because firstly he didn't know where he was and secondly he didn't know where to go... At all. It wasn't like there were some signs or someone to guide him off the boat, because there weren't. Lets be honest here, the boats weren't made for blind people, so he was sure stupid for even agreeing to walk on this stupid boat and staying with stupid Harry. Then we have stupid Zayn who is absolutely stupid, no doubt about that, for grabbing Louis stupid cane, when he knows that he needs it all the time. Everything just felt stupid. He felt stupid. Simply stupid. 

"What's the problem now?" Harry grunted.

"Look here I'm tired of you snapping at me just because I'm doing something that you dislike, but it's not my fucking fault that Zayn took my cane and that I don't know where the hell I am or where the hell I'm supposed to go" Louis crossed his arms over his chest.

Thinking that he won this little argument, or battle, or whatever you can call it, went abruptly out of his mind as he was engulfed up in the air. He gasped as he couldn't feel the floor anymore and he felt like screaming, because he didn't know what was going on. 

"Ow! Stop kicking me! Just put your hands around my neck" 

"What the hell are you doing?! Are you going to throw me off the boat? Please don't! I didn't mean to snap at you, please just don't, I..." Louis stopped talking as Harry shut Louis off with a kiss. It wasn't a kiss that meant anything at all, it was just a gentle peck telling Louis to shut the fuck up and put his hands around his neck so he wouldn't make them both fall.

Louis slowly and hesitantly entangled his fingers around Harry's neck, and entangled his legs a bit tighter around Harry's waist. Harry had his hands just beneath Louis' bum and he was holding him tightly, so he wouldn't drop him. Louis buried his head into Harry's neck and breathed out the air that he was holding in tightly. 

"Did you just kiss me?" Louis whispered slowly into Harry's neck. Goosebumps were created on Harry's neck, as Louis were breathing slowly yet steady.

"It didn't mean anything"

"But you kissed me" 

"So? Haven't you kissed before?" Harry rolled his eyes and asked Louis. An intense silence settled down between them, as Harry realized what he has just done. He had just taken Louis first kiss. With one gentle stupid peek, to make him to shut up and he stole his first kiss just like that. 

"Oh.. I'm sorry... I didn't know that this was your first kiss" Harry admitted worriedly.

"Please don't let me fall" Louis said instead and changed the subject. Harry scrunched his eyebrows and shook his head. 

"Don't worry, I won't let you go"

"Please.. Even if you hate me and this is a perfect time to do something as a revenge, please don't drop me or make me fall.. Please don't let go of me"


	9. Chapter 9

"Truth or dare"

Liam groaned as he was the one who the question was directed for. 

"Remind me again why the fuck we're up at 1 am playing this shitty game? How old are we again? Five?" Harry asked the question that has been stuck on the tip of Liam's tongue for the past ten minutes.

"Come on mate! It's like old times, when we used to be up so late! It brings back good ol' memories" Niall cheered, as all the other boys groaned. 

"It might be a bit fun" Louis admitted shyly. 

"That's because you probably haven't played this game before" Harry scolded.

"Yeah I haven't, yet I'm not a pussy about it!"

"You don't even know what the game is about!" Harry cried out.

"Yes I do! Just because I haven't played it doesn't mean I don't understand it!"

"But you're fucking blind! How can you understand a shit when you're blind? You're so stupid" Harry snapped.

Those simple, yet so strong words threw everyone out of guard as it became totally silent in the small living room that they were currently sitting in. The other lads weren't surprised or chocked about the argument that they had, because lets face it- Harry Styles was a troublemaker and wherever drama or trouble were included, so was he. It was more that he actually had the nerves too use Louis blindness as an insult. The three lads, who now looked incredibly out of place and a bit nervous, because they didn't know what to do or say without minding Louis' and Harry's business. So they did what they were best at- they moved on. Before they could suggest to continuing the game, Louis cleared his throat.

"You're such a hypocrite Harry, you're telling me I'm stupid for being blind? You do know that being blind means that my body doesn't use the visual sensory part of the brain right? So how does that make me stupid, it isn't like my eyes contain my brain cells or where the information that I gather, like a storage. I can still use my brain perfectly thank you very much, but you insulting me and trying to flaunt that my blindness is a huge flaw, won't really work. It doesn't make me stupid, but you saying that stuff and you being an asshole- actually makes you look like a stupid. So how about we continue this game, because lets face it- you'll always be a jerk and it won't change, so how about we try to have some fun eh?"

"Truth" Liam said in the end, cutting the tension and the awkward silence that had settled down since the first second that Niall suggested to play this stupid game.

"Who's the hottest lad in this room?" Niall asked, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. 

"C'mon! I have a girlfriend!" Liam cried out as his cheeks heated up.

"Wrong answer Payno, now chop chop answer the question!" Nall chirped.

"Ugh fine... erh Zayn" Liam groaned and hid his face in his hands.

"Well thank you Liam!" Zayn beamed, grinning and smirking at the same time. 

"Ugh whatever! Zayn, truth or dare?"

"Dare"

"I dare you to smell on your own socks!" Liam said smugly, as all the other lads groaned.

"Is that the best dare you got? Seriously Liam? Smell your own socks?" Niall cried out. Liam shrugged as Zayn took off his socks and smelled them. Luckily for him, he had just put on new socks so they didn't smell anything but washing powder.

"Harry truth or dare?" Zayn asked as he put on his socks again.

"Truth"

"Why are you such a dick?" Zayn asked as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Really? Is this how we play games right now? Well too reply your question Zayn, I'm not a dick for being honest and telling the truth. Take it or leave it" 

"Just because you have a dick, doesn't mean you should act as a dick too. Tell me do you feel so intimidated by other people that you're always such a dick?" Zayn raised his eyebrows.

"I would happily reply your question, but seeing as this is a game, where you can only ask one question, you don't really have the rights to get an answer. Lou, truth or dare?" Harry asked but caught himself when he realized that he just called Louis for Lou, but he let it go. 

The other lads didn't realize the slip of words that he just said, but Louis heard it clearly and briefly, and he was a bit confused. Isn't it only friends who call each other by their nicknames? They were clearly not friends, at all. They were more like enemies, or too be perfectly honest it was more like Louis was Harry's enemy. Louis didn't even despise Harry, sure he found him really annoying, obnoxious and stuck up- but no he didn't hate him. How could he hate him when he didn't really know him?

"Um truth" 

"Has anyone told you to hide in a room recently or just disappear, just like that? Because my eyes are starting to hurt, looking at you."

"Harry!" The other three lads hissed. Zayn stood up, his fits clenched up tightly and his jaw clenched tightly as well, showing his perfectly face structure. 

"Dude you just fucking crossed the line, I don't understand what the fuck is your problem, but there's clearly something wrong with you for just going off on people like that!" Zayn shouted as he pulled Harry up with the collar of his shirt. 

Liam and Niall instantly jumped up and pulled the two young, but raging lads away from each other. Zayn was breathing hardly, he had the urge to punch Harry over and over again for treating Louis like that. He has no right to treat anyone, specially Louis who is his best friend, like that. Harry was looking more like the opposite to be honest, instead of smirking and looking angry, he looked embarrassed and scared as well. 

"I'm sorry, I know I crossed the line" Harry said quietly as he looked at Louis.

"An apology won't do anything good, you're still a fucking asshole. I'm one step of fucking punching you and showing you how to be as a person, but you seri.." 

"Zayn!"Zayn was erupted by Louis shouting out, not in an angry tone, but in a tone which clearly screamed just-shut-the-fuck-up-and-listen-to-me-already. Zayn's eyes softened as he glanced at Louis, who was still sitting up, but looking around frantically with worried eyes.

"What Lou?" Zayn asked gently.

"Just don't start any fights, it's okay. Just let's sit down and play this game so I can go back too sleep already!" He explained. All the boys glanced around, then sat down silently. Louis cleared his throat and entwined his hands in his lap.

"The answer is no. No one has told me that recently, but I've been told that many times before. Um Niall truth or dare?"

"Dare mate'!" Niall chirped up, not affected by the tension in the room.

"Who was your first crush?" Louis asked smugly.

"There was this blonde girl, Savannah back in old' Mullingar, she was something fiesty" He admitted and all the boys laughed.

"Harry, truth or dare?" 

"Dare"

"I dare you too kiss Louis, on the mouth, as an apology" Niall cried out as Liam hit his head from behind. 

Harry's eyes went really wide, but then he remember that it was nothing. It was just a kiss with Louis. Nothing will happen and nothing really matters. Even if Harry wouldn't in a million years admit it, he thought that Louis' looked good and there wasn't any wrong with his appearance. He didn't have any problem with kissing a guy or a girl either, he's been there and he's done that. He's probably experienced every single little thing that contains sexual touching too be honest, with both genders. Yet he couldn't kiss Louis. He just couldn't. First of all, he's been a jerk and he's been treating Louis badly, specially today. Second of all, it was already bad enough that he stole his first kiss earlier today on the boat. So he didn't want too kiss him. It wasn't anything about rejection, it was just that.. he actually had feelings. He didn't have feelings for Louis, of course not, he could never have feelings- more importantly feel anything emotionally for another person. But he wasn't ice cold, not entirely. He did care and he did feel pity. So that's the reason why he couldn't find him too fuck Louis over, in another way.

"Chicken" Harry said and stood up, as he left for his room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I advice you to follow me on wattpad- misspeache- because I update the story there more often!


	10. Chapter 10

Have you ever felt that pitiful feeling knotting deep inside your stomach? 

That feeling which makes you feel lonely, unloved, and ignored? 

It doesn't matter how much you try, it doesn't matter how much you try too find all the flaws inside you only too fix them, it doesn't matter how much you try too change yourself only yet to get rejected by other people, it simply doesn't matter.

Rejected. That's what Louis felt. Disgusting, unloved and hated were three other words that you could define for the feeling that was knotting itself deeply inside his stomach. He wasn't supposed too care, he wasn't supposed too feel those stinging tears in the back of his eyes, he wasn't supposed too ask himself quietly the question "why?" over and over again.

No, he was supposed too laugh it off and snarl a sassy comment about how he didn't want too kiss Harry, how he didn't want too feel his lips twice in a day. He was supposed too tell him that he couldn't care less, and that it was a relief that he wouldn't kiss him. But he couldn't. He couldn't get out the silence that was settled down when Harry arose up and left the room. What's worse is that he couldn't see the other lads faces, their expressions. He couldn't see their pitiful faces or that Zayn was so red, of all the anger that was fuming inside him. No, of course he couldn't see, because even if he hated to admit it;he was blind.

Without any word, Louis stood up and guided himself with the stick out from the living room. He counted too three; three was how long it took for him too walk out the living room, three seconds after he could finally exhale the air that he was holding in tightly that fulfilled his lungs. Instead of walking too his room, he found himself walking a bit fast too another direction. He stopped in front of the door and made sure he was in front of the right one. Without knocking, he opened the door immediately and pushed it wide open. 

"Who do you think you are?!" He screamed. He didn't know where Harry was standing in the room, but he definitely knew he was inside his bedroom as he heard Harry squeak as he was surprised when Louis opened the door. 

"First off you take my first kiss, just by kissing me like that and then you fucking reject me in front of everyone?! Do you think this is a game Styles?" 

Before Louis could continue his long speech about how rude and what an asshole that Harry Edward Styles is, he was dragged inside the room by Harry and he shut the door with his leg. He pushed Louis back, so that his back hit the wall and his stick fell down abruptly. Harry put his hands on the wall next too Louis' face and inhaled tightly. But Louis wouldn't have anything of that, he definitely wouldn't. Louis was known for not shutting up, he was known for always being honest and saying his opinions no matter how harsh or true they are. So he did what he was best on; he kept talking and he continued with his speech.

"I've had enough of your bullshit, I've been here for five days and I'm so tired of you being an asshole! Why did you reject me in front of all the lads?" Louis yelled as he digged his fingers in Harry's chest. "Do you think you're so much better than me just because you're a fucking pop star?" He shouted once again, digging his fingers repeatedly in Harry's chest. 

"Do you think you're better than me just because I'm fucking blind? Do you know how much it hurts when you're such an asshole? I'm so confused by your attitude, one second you're actually nice and behind all that rudeness, I can see the real you. The other second you're a twat, a huge dickhead, and I feel like exploding every time I'm near you! It's like I'm a time bomb and every time you come closer too me, I keep ticking and I keep waiting for me too explode! Who do you think you are?!"

"I'm sorry, I didn't.."

"No, now's the time for you too shut up and let me finish! You think you're so great and everyone loves you, well let me tell you something; you're not. You're so full of yourself, and if I could, I wouldn't think twice before shouting to the world what such a dickhead you are and how much I hate your annoying, selfish guts."

He shouted, as Harry stepped closer too him breathing on his face as his blue eyes glared daggers into Harry's green ones. Harry should've been pissed off and defended himself, but he couldn't help but too fall in those blue eyes. For the first time, they weren't blank. They were full of emotions and a tad darker than usual. They were mesmerizing and he couldn't think when he was gazing into his eyes. They stood stiffen, eyes piercing with anger, neither of them willing to be the first one to back down. The air was full of tension, making their skin burn and tingle. Their breaths were shallow, but harshly and their hearts pumped loudly with adrenaline and heartache. 

Neither was sure who moved first, but seeing at Harry was the only one who was able too actually see, he gripped Louis slim waist and tugged him forward so that their mouths crashed together. Louis buried his hands deeply in Harry's curls, tugging a bit harshly and scraping his scalp as Harry breathed out a loudly moan. Harry tugged tighter on Louis slim waist, pulling their bodies together making their legs entangled in each others. As their lips were molding harshly with each others, Harry slowly pulled Louis too the end of his bed and laid him down. 

Without breaking the kissing, he hovered over Louis, putting one of his legs between Louis. With entangled legs, chest to chest, and melding lips, Harry pulled back and broke the kiss. Louis whined a bit at the loss of contact but then came too his senses.

"Oh my god, I'm.. I just.. No I" he couldn't even form any words or sentences, because he didn't know how too explain himself or what just happened. But surely it wasn't just him who actually enjoyed it a bit, right? Harry put his finger over Louis' lips and whispered "schh" before he peeked his lips tentatively.

"Do you regret it?" he whispered as he ran his thumb softly over Louis' jaw line. 

He couldn't help looking at every inch of Louis' face and look fondly at him. He wasn't used too feel any kind of fondness to any human creature, but there was something about Louis which made him feel again. All those past months, he has been feeling so numb. So incredibly numb, it was like he was on the edge of a roof and yet he couldn't give a single fuck if he jumped or not. He couldn't feel, he didn't have any pity, everything vanished from him, sucked up of the earth. But with Louis... he felt so grounded. He felt like he had limits of what he could do or say, he was feeling again. He didn't want too hurt Louis and there was a part of him aching for Louis because he knew how fragile he was. 

Then those beautiful, yet so blank blue eyes. He couldn't help but get lost in them every single them he gazed at them. It didn't matter in what mood he was in or how he was feeling, because when he looked in Louis' eyes; he forgot everything. Louis was so beautiful, so god dammit beautiful. Harry wanted to hate him, but he couldn't so he let his walls down and started to just simply let go.

"No.. do you?" Louis replied as he played with Harry's hair as his hands were still buried there.

"No" Harry sighed and kissed Louis' forehead.

"But why? You hate me"

"Lets not talk about that now okay? Just don't think tonight"

"Okay"

"Okay" 

Harry sighed and moved to the space next to Louis on the bed. He put his hand out and pulled Louis right next too him, as their legs entangled and Louis gripped Harry's shirt tightly. He rested his head on his chest and sighed loudly. Harry buried his hand in Louis' hair, playing softly with it and resting his head over Louis'.

"Harry?"

"Yes?"

"Do you want to know something?"

"What is it Lou?" He sighed, fake annoyed.

"Lou? Wow did you go softy on me?" 

"Whatever Lewis, what did you know?"

"I just realized something."

"What Lou?"

"Your hair is fluffy, just like a cheap"


End file.
